Grandparent Autism Network

a vital resource for autism...and each other!

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Tips & Suggestions

Networking together, we are a vital resource for each other. Please share information you feel will help grandparents to improve their understanding of autism, interactions with grandchildren and enhance their family relationships.

Tip categories are posted on the right. Choose a category by clicking on it. New information is added frequently and we encourage you to visit often.

Holiday Tips

The holiday season is a joyful time of the year, but it also can be stressful for kids with autism spectrum disorders (ASD) and other neurodevelopmental disorders.
Here are a few tips from our Behavior Intervention team!

Provide Concrete Information & Clear Expectations for your Child

  • Create a calendar of events. Include beginning and end times of activities.
  • Explain to your child what behaviors are and are not expected.
  • Provide opportunities to “reward” your child for expected behavior through verbal praise, stickers, high-fives, etc.
  • Roleplay and practice new social situations. Work together to create a “social story” that incorporates all elements of an upcoming event or visit to better prepare them for that situation. Social stories: Click here

Provide Information Visually

  • Take pictures of relatives and friends you will visit and practice names.
  • Video modeling is considered an evidence-based way to teach your child. Take videos of how to unwrap a gift the right way, or thank a family member, or greet new people. Role play with your child and practice ahead of time.
  • Use pictures to help your child communicate or make choices of what they would like to have or say.

Reduce Anxiety

  • Plan ahead when possible. Create a list of activities that can help your child during downtime.
  • Provide a quiet place for your child to retreat and relax when needed.
  • Relax and have a good time. If you are tense your child may sense that something isn’t right.
  • Don’t shield your child from the extended family. Family members need to understand the challenges you face.

Provided by The Center for Autism & Neurodevelopmental Disorders

Autism Friendly Travel Destinations

Meow Wolf

Collaborating with IBCCES, Meow Wolf’s Santa Fe, Denver, Dallas, and Las Vegas locations have completed staff training and onsite reviews, enhancing their immersive art experiences for autistic and sensory-sensitive guests. This accomplishment underscores Meow Wolf’s dedication to inclusivity and accessibility, ensuring that their captivating spaces offer enjoyment to a diverse audience.

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Kennedy Space Center

The space center’s team has completed specialized training and certification processes through IBCCES to better understand and cater to the needs of autistic and sensory-sensitive guests and offer more accessibility tools and resources such as sensory ratings for all areas of the visitor complex.

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Missouri City Parks and Recreation Certified Autism Center™

The Missouri City Parks and Recreation Certified Autism Center™ achievement marks the first parks & recreation department in Texas to attain this designation. Along with its certification, the department offers diverse adaptive recreation programs that provide opportunities for active participation for individuals of varying abilities. It also offers specialized classes such as archery, gardening, kayaking, and drumming.

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Hyland Hills Water World

Since being awarded the Certified Autism Center™ accolade in 2020, Hyland Hills Water World has expanded its accessibility efforts to ensure all guests can enjoy the water park.

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Knoebels Amusement Resort

The park first achieved this certification in 2019 and has been committed to continuing its efforts to provide a welcoming and inclusive experience for autistic and sensory-sensitive individuals and their families.

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Splish Splash Water Park

Since initial autism certification in 2019, Splish Splash has offered Sensory Guides developed in partnership with IBCCES. These guides provide valuable information about the impact on the five senses for each attraction to allow guests to better choose their own adventure throughout their park visit.

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AutismTravel

Taking a vacation together as a family can be challenging. We created Autism Travel to provide families and individuals with easy access to destinations and attractions that are trained and certified in autism and special needs care.

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A Guide to Moving with Children Who Have Autism

Moving becomes a part of our lives at many different stages: When we move away from our parents, relocate for a job opportunity, or find somewhere new to retire. No matter your circumstances, it can be a stressful process. And if you’re moving with a child with autism, it’s especially important to help relieve moving stress for both you and your kid.

This guide provides helpful tools and tips to integrate a child into their new home.

For more information please visit their website.

How to Support Parents

You can provide emotional support for the parents of your grandchild with autism. Most families find that facing this challenge together, with acceptance and optimism, brings the family closer. Many parents of kids with autism say that getting verbal approval and support from their own parents means a lot.

Offer emotional support and a listening ear without judgment. Be available when your son or daughter needs to vent or wants to share a success. Knowing they can come to you without being judged or receiving advice can be a relief and reinforcing. Always compliment and reinforce them.

Keep any information about the child and family confidential. Parents prefer to share information about their child, the diagnosis and needs as they choose, rather than having you or others talking about any issues the child or family is having.

There are many controversial and expensive treatments available for treating autism but choosing treatments is up to the parents. They should not have to defend their decisions or whether or not to select an intervention. That being said, you should not feel responsible for financially sponsoring therapies that are not evidence based and proven effective. Currently, Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) is the only medically endorsed treatment that is especially effective when started at a young age.

Ask how you can be helpful. Parenting a child with autism can be exhausting. Any offers, no matter how small, will be truly appreciated. You might sponsor babysitting, meals, special programs and services, family outings or sleepovers at your home.

Provide support for your autistic grandchild’s siblings. They too often lack the attention they need. Sometimes grandparents find it easier focusing on the siblings and that provides additional respite time for parents, as well.
Focus on staying connected and committed to each other. This gives everyone in your family a sense of belonging. Families say positive things can come out of difficult experiences. For example, some find difficult experiences help them to learn patience, compassion, acceptance and respect for other.

  • Send them care packages with items you know they will enjoy.
  • Post photographs or pictures of local places prior to their visit to you so they can anticipate your outings together.
  • Put your picture on the calendar on the date you will be reunited. The child can then anticipate when you will be together again.
  • Educate yourself and your extended family about autism. Attend seminars, read books, call or email your family to get frequent updates on your grandchild’s progress.

Focus on staying connected and committed to each other. This gives everyone in your family a sense of belonging.

Grandparent Tips for Staying in Touch with Grandkids

You can make a deep and life changing impact on your grandchildren by being supportive to their parents and them whether you live nearby or far away. Support, affirmation and love will help to get your family through the challenges of raising a child with autism.

Research shows that early, frequent and loving involvement of family members is one of the best ways to help children with ASD.  Grandparents can give their families respect, acceptance, love and happy memories. Here are some suggestions about how you can regularly stay in touch, communicate and play an important role in your grandchildren’s lives.

  1. Learn as much as possible about autism. Information about how children with autism see the world, how they communicate and act, will help you to understand and connect with your grandchild. Autism Speaks is a great site with answers to questions you may have and it provides lots of family resources.
  2. If you go online together, it’s important to remember that children with autism may need more time to process information. Be kind and flexible because they may find it difficult to adapt to this format of being together. You may need to use gestures or other ways to communicate besides words. Use positive reinforcement. Praise good behavior – and do not take things personally if their responses are blunt.
  3. There are many free online video chat services available such as Zoom, FaceTime, Skype and Google Hangout. Set up a regular scheduled timeline that works best for everyone to chat online.
  4. Ask the parents about your grandchild’s specific interests, favorite activities and the best means of communicating with them. Search for materials about those interests that you can share when you talk together.

Here are some activities you might share:

  • Cook a quick (30 minutes or less) favorite family recipe together. NOTE: Send a parent a list of ingredients in advance so the child has everything ready for your visit.
  • Color or paint together using the same paint sets or coloring books you have sent to them, in advance.
  • Work together on craft sets you have provided. Origami, felt work, ornaments and greeting cards are some projects you can share. Needlework like crochet, knitting, cross stitch and needlepoint starter kits are also available to send to them.
  • Music lessons. If you play an instrument, help your grandchild to develop an appreciation for music. There are beginner’s music books for piano, guitar, violin, clarinet and saxophone.
  • Read a favorite book to your grandchild online or record your reading and send it to them. Find picture books for younger children and, if possible, send your grandchild the same book so they can follow along with you as you read to them.
  • If video contact is not possible, engage with email or phone calls on a regular basis. Send greeting cards, letters or care packages and always enclose your picture or a picture of you and your grandchild sitting together reading, talking, eating, laughing.

While these suggestions are ways you might more easily engage with your grandchild with autism, they may also be effective to stay in touch with your typical grandchildren. They, too, need your loving support!

Grandparents are Great Resources for Sibling Support

Because children with autism require more attention, therapies and support, the needs of their brothers and sisters are frequently overlooked. Siblings share many of the same concerns their parents have regarding social isolation, the need for information and they worry about the caregiving expectations their parents have for them in the future. Sometimes, they feel resentment, embarrassment and under great pressure to achieve. They are frequently in the waiting room when “family centered” counseling and services are offered and are overlooked by support agencies.

Here are some ways you can help them:

  • Plan to spend special time with siblings and be a good listener. If you provide a safe, comfortable environment, they may express their concerns to you.
  • When siblings argue, try to remember that typically developing children deserve a life where they, like other children, sometimes misbehave get angry and fight. Try not to intervene with statements like “Leave your brother alone. You are bigger, you are stronger, you should know better. It is your job to compromise.” They are already more likely to feel guilty about their sibling’s developmental needs and most siblings have disagreements from time to time.
  • Siblings deserve to have their own personal safety given as much as their brother or sister who has special needs. f they are in vulnerable situations due to aggressive or challenging behaviors, try to provide as much respite time as possible for them. Try to plan activities that will keep them apart and enable you to give your full attention to only one of them at a time.
  • Offer to care for your grandchild with autism so that parents can spend personal time away with their sibling(s). It will convey the message that parents are supportive of all of their children and afford them the opportunity to communicate about their concerns.
  • Important to Remember: One child’s special needs should not overshadow another’s achievements and milestones. Celebrate and reinforce the accomplishments of all of your grandchildren.

You may find more information about sibling support groups by calling your local children’s hospital or go online to these sites: http://www.siblingsupport.org/ and http://siblingleadership.org

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