Grandparent Autism Network

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Tips & Suggestions

Networking together, we are a vital resource for each other. Please share information you feel will help grandparents to improve their understanding of autism, interactions with grandchildren and enhance their family relationships.

Tip categories are posted on the right. Choose a category by clicking on it. New information is added frequently and we encourage you to visit often.

A Guide to Moving with Children Who Have Autism

Moving becomes a part of our lives at many different stages: When we move away from our parents, relocate for a job opportunity, or find somewhere new to retire. No matter your circumstances, it can be a stressful process. And if you’re moving with a child with autism, it’s especially important to help relieve moving stress for both you and your kid.

This guide provides helpful tools and tips to integrate a child into their new home.

For more information please visit their website.

How to Support Parents

You can provide emotional support for the parents of your grandchild with autism. Most families find that facing this challenge together, with acceptance and optimism, brings the family closer. Many parents of kids with autism say that getting verbal approval and support from their own parents means a lot.

Offer emotional support and a listening ear without judgment. Be available when your son or daughter needs to vent or wants to share a success. Knowing they can come to you without being judged or receiving advice can be a relief and reinforcing. Always compliment and reinforce them.

Keep any information about the child and family confidential. Parents prefer to share information about their child, the diagnosis and needs as they choose, rather than having you or others talking about any issues the child or family is having.

There are many controversial and expensive treatments available for treating autism but choosing treatments is up to the parents. They should not have to defend their decisions or whether or not to select an intervention. That being said, you should not feel responsible for financially sponsoring therapies that are not evidence based and proven effective. Currently, Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) is the only medically endorsed treatment that is especially effective when started at a young age.

Ask how you can be helpful. Parenting a child with autism can be exhausting. Any offers, no matter how small, will be truly appreciated. You might sponsor babysitting, meals, special programs and services, family outings or sleepovers at your home.

Provide support for your autistic grandchild’s siblings. They too often lack the attention they need. Sometimes grandparents find it easier focusing on the siblings and that provides additional respite time for parents, as well.
Focus on staying connected and committed to each other. This gives everyone in your family a sense of belonging. Families say positive things can come out of difficult experiences. For example, some find difficult experiences help them to learn patience, compassion, acceptance and respect for other.

  • Send them care packages with items you know they will enjoy.
  • Post photographs or pictures of local places prior to their visit to you so they can anticipate your outings together.
  • Put your picture on the calendar on the date you will be reunited. The child can then anticipate when you will be together again.
  • Educate yourself and your extended family about autism. Attend seminars, read books, call or email your family to get frequent updates on your grandchild’s progress.

Focus on staying connected and committed to each other. This gives everyone in your family a sense of belonging.

Grandparent Tips for Staying in Touch with Grandkids

You can make a deep and life changing impact on your grandchildren by being supportive to their parents and them whether you live nearby or far away. Support, affirmation and love will help to get your family through the challenges of raising a child with autism.

Research shows that early, frequent and loving involvement of family members is one of the best ways to help children with ASD.  Grandparents can give their families respect, acceptance, love and happy memories. Here are some suggestions about how you can regularly stay in touch, communicate and play an important role in your grandchildren’s lives.

  1. Learn as much as possible about autism. Information about how children with autism see the world, how they communicate and act, will help you to understand and connect with your grandchild. Autism Speaks is a great site with answers to questions you may have and it provides lots of family resources.
  2. If you go online together, it’s important to remember that children with autism may need more time to process information. Be kind and flexible because they may find it difficult to adapt to this format of being together. You may need to use gestures or other ways to communicate besides words. Use positive reinforcement. Praise good behavior – and do not take things personally if their responses are blunt.
  3. There are many free online video chat services available such as Zoom, FaceTime, Skype and Google Hangout. Set up a regular scheduled timeline that works best for everyone to chat online.
  4. Ask the parents about your grandchild’s specific interests, favorite activities and the best means of communicating with them. Search for materials about those interests that you can share when you talk together.

Here are some activities you might share:

  • Cook a quick (30 minutes or less) favorite family recipe together. NOTE: Send a parent a list of ingredients in advance so the child has everything ready for your visit.
  • Color or paint together using the same paint sets or coloring books you have sent to them, in advance.
  • Work together on craft sets you have provided. Origami, felt work, ornaments and greeting cards are some projects you can share. Needlework like crochet, knitting, cross stitch and needlepoint starter kits are also available to send to them.
  • Music lessons. If you play an instrument, help your grandchild to develop an appreciation for music. There are beginner’s music books for piano, guitar, violin, clarinet and saxophone.
  • Read a favorite book to your grandchild online or record your reading and send it to them. Find picture books for younger children and, if possible, send your grandchild the same book so they can follow along with you as you read to them.
  • If video contact is not possible, engage with email or phone calls on a regular basis. Send greeting cards, letters or care packages and always enclose your picture or a picture of you and your grandchild sitting together reading, talking, eating, laughing.

While these suggestions are ways you might more easily engage with your grandchild with autism, they may also be effective to stay in touch with your typical grandchildren. They, too, need your loving support!

Grandparents are Great Resources for Sibling Support

Because children with autism require more attention, therapies and support, the needs of their brothers and sisters are frequently overlooked. Siblings share many of the same concerns their parents have regarding social isolation, the need for information and they worry about the caregiving expectations their parents have for them in the future. Sometimes, they feel resentment, embarrassment and under great pressure to achieve. They are frequently in the waiting room when “family centered” counseling and services are offered and are overlooked by support agencies.

Here are some ways you can help them:

  • Plan to spend special time with siblings and be a good listener. If you provide a safe, comfortable environment, they may express their concerns to you.
  • When siblings argue, try to remember that typically developing children deserve a life where they, like other children, sometimes misbehave get angry and fight. Try not to intervene with statements like “Leave your brother alone. You are bigger, you are stronger, you should know better. It is your job to compromise.” They are already more likely to feel guilty about their sibling’s developmental needs and most siblings have disagreements from time to time.
  • Siblings deserve to have their own personal safety given as much as their brother or sister who has special needs. f they are in vulnerable situations due to aggressive or challenging behaviors, try to provide as much respite time as possible for them. Try to plan activities that will keep them apart and enable you to give your full attention to only one of them at a time.
  • Offer to care for your grandchild with autism so that parents can spend personal time away with their sibling(s). It will convey the message that parents are supportive of all of their children and afford them the opportunity to communicate about their concerns.
  • Important to Remember: One child’s special needs should not overshadow another’s achievements and milestones. Celebrate and reinforce the accomplishments of all of your grandchildren.

You may find more information about sibling support groups by calling your local children’s hospital or go online to these sites: http://www.siblingsupport.org/ and http://siblingleadership.org

Preparing Your Home

Here are a few helpful tips to prepare your home.

Add locks for security or to limit access to potentially dangerous areas. Safety locks may be needed on bathroom, kitchen and laundry room cabinets. Cover over electrical outlets and limit access to electrical appliances.

Provide gates or barriers to prevent falling down steps or to limit access to certain areas.

Arrange furniture simply and practically. Clear table surfaces, provide appropriate chairs, and move furniture away from shelves or where a child may climb.

If your grandchild is at high risk for running away (also referred to as “eloping”), place locks or alarms on exterior doors and windows that provide exits from the home. Contact the local police and fire departments and provide them with a photo and description of the child in addition to contact information for family members.

Emergency Preparedness Documents for Individuals and Families

The Emergency Preparedness documents in this library contain information and tips to help individuals and families prepare for an emergency.  Information in these documents informs people on what to do before, during, and after an emergency.  Download these PDF documents for FREE by simply clicking on the image or the document name.

Prepare for Emergencies Now – Information to Get Ready (PDF Brochure)

An excellent outline of what it takes to prepare an emergency including: being informed, making a plan, building a kit, and getting involved.
DOWNLOAD BROCHURE

Prepare for Emergencies Now – Information for Older Americans (PDF Brochure)

A brochure with emergency preparedness tips specifically directed to older Americans on things to consider when preparing for an emergency.
DOWNLOAD BROCHURE

Prepare for Emergencies Now – Information for People with Disabilities (PDF Brochure)

A unique brochure with information specific to Americans with disabilities and other access and functional needs regarding emergency preparedness.
DOWNLOAD BROCHURE

Prepare for Emergencies Now – Information for Pet Owners (PDF Brochure)

A unique brochure containing information for pet owners and suggestions for proactive pet emergency preparedness.
DOWNLOAD BROCHURE

Preparing for Disaster for People with Disabilities and Other Special Needs (PDF Booklet)

This booklet contains emergency preparedness information to inform those with disabilities and other special needs prepare for an emergency.
DOWNLOAD BROCHURE

Helping Children Cope with Disaster (PDF Booklet)

This booklet provides parents with information about how to help their children cope with disaster.
DOWNLOAD BROCHURE

Food and Water in an Emergency (PDF Booklet)

This booklet contains useful information on food and water needs before, during and after an emergency.
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Family Communication Plan for Parents (PDF Form)

A two page form designed to help families document important information that will be needed in the event of an emergency.
DOWNLOAD BROCHURE

Family Communication Plan for Kids (PDF Form)

A two page form designed to help families document important information that will be needed in the event of an emergency.
DOWNLOAD BROCHURE

Disaster Preparedness Coloring Book for Children (PDF Booklet)

Designed to help parents and educators teach children about the basics of emergency preparedness.  This booklet contains information to help parents and educators explain the different types of disasters that can occur how how best to react.  It also contains coloring pages for children.
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Commuter Emergency Plan (PDF Form)

A one page form to help individuals develop a plan should disaster strike when traveling between work and home, or other commonly visited locations.
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Preparing for Disaster (PDF Booklet)

A document that outlines four essential steps to preparing for a disaster:  Get Informed, Make a Plan, Assemble a Kit, and Maintain Your Plan and Kit.
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Emergency Financial First Aid Kit – EFFAK (PDF Booklet)

The EFFAK is a flexible tool designed to help individuals and families at all income levels collect and secure the documentation they would need to get on the road to recovery without unnecessary delays, should disaster strike. The EFFAK also includes helpful tips and suggestions regarding how to safeguard important information, what to do in case of an emergency, and how to work with others to strengthen community preparedness.
DOWNLOAD BROCHURE

Some of the documents in this library are authored by FEMA and the Department of Homeland Security. While FEMA and the Department of Homeland Security provides permission to EmergencyKits.com to publish these documents, FEMA and the Department of Homeland Security is not affiliated with and does not endorse EmergencyKits.com.

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